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Around this time of the year, it is commonplace to discuss resolutions, goals and objectives for the next year; but I want to do something slightly different. I want to discuss two topics that test our character and allow us to live the life we dream about: forgiveness and vision. I want to discuss how to truly forgive and have a clear vision of what we want to do, where we want to go and most importantly, how we want to feel during our time on this beautiful planet.
True Forgiveness
I understand that forgiveness is no easy task. This is especially true of the most important aspect of true forgiveness; self-forgiveness.
The ego screams loudly and clearly that we should focus on all the wrongdoers in our lives. I can assure you from personal experience that if you are able to hold up a mirror and be kind and forgiving to yourself, you are on the path to true freedom. You will be unable to move forward on your path to true personal growth if you are full of blame, condemnation and engaged in default escape behaviors rather than dealing with the issues you need to address.
Holding on to resentment is like taking poison and hoping the other person will die. It is always about you. Responsibility is about making a choice to feel more vibrant. It is your responsibility to move out of past hurts and into the true bliss of the present, without the excess baggage of condemnation. Forgiveness is the freeing of the self from the past, and facing the future wiser, with renewed hope and faith. Forgiveness is an unconditional gift of love. This doesn't mean "I will forgive you if or when", but "I forgive you because I must if I ever hope to continue my own healing."
In my process of psychological and spiritual growth, I laid the groundwork for a higher level of true forgiveness. This entailed letting go of judgments against any of the people, places or things in my life that I thought had treated me unjustly. Even more powerful, I stopped my own ego from continually judging myself for all of the real or imagined injustices I'd committed. I stopped being the hypocritical bad guy in my own consciousness. When I really began to forgive myself, my actions and behaviors followed. When I realized that I was not exempt from wrongdoing and got real with myself, the level of forgiveness went to a depth that has brought with it peace and serenity.
We must forgive now. We must forgive in 2009. We must forgive always. Life is too short to hold grudges. Life is too short to waste time on negativity; we should put our energy to use in trying to realize and live our dreams.
A Clear Vision
Let your vision fly. Do not block its path with limitations based on past experiences. When you have a clear vision for your career path, relationships, family, and community, it is easier to develop a day-to-day life plan. It is important to step out of the box of your present circumstances when envisioning your future. Visioning is about creating a new, fresh reality.
Resist the very human, ego-based urge to "keep it real", while envisioning your life. Even though your vision might not seem entirely logical at times, go for it anyway. The sky and beyond is the limit. You do not need to fixate on one single vision. Play with it and have fun. Your vision and life plan will evolve and become an absolute reality if you live in the present moment.
Goals are the individual step-by-step process of making your vision a reality. Goals are the process of laying out a plan of right actions that are aligned with your values and vision and will propel you forward toward complete satisfaction when you arrive at your goal destinations. Goals are the means you use to take the incremental steps to reach achievable targets.
If you set goals that do not reflect your values, it can lead to a tremendous amount of frustration and ultimately, failure. It is important to monitor how you are feeling as you move along the continuum of goal accomplishment. This is why it is important to set some short-term and mid-range goals. You will be able to determine if you are on the right track toward making your vision a reality.
All of your goals should be based on your value system. When you set goals based on what is truly important to you, obstacles and problems that arise will not impede your progress. You will be more committed and persistent in your effort to reach your goals. Many people pull up short of achieving their goals out of fear that they may fail. They give up too soon. It is important to use fear to propel rather than paralyze.
Overcoming fear by staying committed, persistent, and consistent will provide the emotional integration you need to achieve your goals. 2009 will be wonderful!
Thanks for your time folks! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
About the writer: Kevin Touhey is the Amazon Best Selling Author of The Miracle of Optimism. If you enjoyed this article you may like to visit his blog or follow him on Twitter.
Originally posted at PickTheBrain a weblog dedicated to self improvement and motivation.
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